It really did happen this way. I, GEMINI, was there and saw the whole thing. Actually, it was AQUARIUS who leaked the details of the upcoming meeting. You know, they never can keep a secret.

Twas the night before Christmas and all through the town, every creature was stirring and it was all because of LEO.

You see, LEO had arranged for dear ol' Santa to meet the zodiac. letter from santa Under the guise of wanting Santa to become better acquainted with the personalities of each zodiac sign and making sure everyone got the right gift, LEO set the scene for his thinly-veiled disguise to be center stage. Ever the inspiration for fun, LEO left the details to everyone else. Unfortunately, with good planning, but bad directions, PISCES was left in charge of giving Santa the landing coordinates.

It was 7: 30PM last Monday night and Santa was late. SAGITTARIUS, who forgot to fill the gas tank of her monster SUV, had to hitch a ride with LEO in his Corvette and that was the only reason she wasn't late too. I watched Leo set up his stage equipment while SAG went out for an exploratory hike. Suddenly, careening around the tree line came ARIES, riding his nitro-fueled, big wheeled quad. Mad that he was not first on the scene, ARIES spun angry donuts in the dirt, spewing dust and gravel up my nose.

Next to arrive, Wrangler-wearing TAURUS approached the growing crowd, riding his favorite Quarter horse stallion and leading his prize Angus bull by the nose (which was really more of a pet than a money-maker).

Boy, was I wound tight. Shifting from foot to foot, I anxiously questioned VIRGO as to the whereabouts of Santa and CAPRICORN. She said I sounded like Hammy, the caffeinated squirrel in Over the Hedge. Peering over her eyeglasses, she told me I was talking too fast to be understood. Ignoring her, I turned my attention to the sound of rolling wheels behind me.

Pulling a red wagon filled with homemade cookies and hot chocolate, CANCER and her brood smiled and waved as they bounced along the rutted dirt road. They were pulling a little red wagon filled with homemade cookies and hot chocolate. We always could count on her to supply treats for the really important occasions.

Meanwhile, LEO, still busy setting up his microphone, sang out in his best performance voice, "Testing, one, two, three. " Suddenly, a large shadow covered the moonlit ground. Turning toward the east, we all witnessed two approaching vehicles, a UFO-type craft, followed by a brightly colored sleigh. Ever vigilant, VIRGO was the first to shout, "Look, it's Santa! Quick, rake the dirt for a smooth landing! "

LIBRA graciously & quietly announced that it was only good manners for everyone to form a parting-of-the-masses line to properly greet Santa.

The two aircraft quietly landed in the meadow. Out of the UFO jogged AQUARIUS, dressed in outdated go-go boots with a multi-colored Guatemalan poncho thrown carelessly over her shoulder. She looked stunning! When I asked her what she was doing she told us that while out scouring the cosmos she ran across Santa, who said he knew he was lost when he tried to land his big sleigh on the docks at Boston harbor. Everyone grimaced and looked over at PISCES, who smiled sweetly and was instantly forgiven for his lack of accurate directions.

Smiling benevolently, Santa climbed out of his sleigh and greeted each of us from the zodiac. He was mighty impressed with LIBRA'S perfectly formed greeting lines.

LEO, still on stage, broke out in a rousing rendition of Hail, Hail, the Gang's All Here. SAG excitedly interrupted, requesting the song, Joy To The World.

ARIES barged to the front of the line trying to greet Santa first. I watched SCORPIO throw ARIES a withering glance that could freeze water. ARIES reluctantly got back in line. As LEO belted out Joy To The World, he was once again interrupted with a song request from AQUARIUS. "LEO, sing We Are The World! " LEO happily obliged, glad to have all eyes on him. AQUARIUS hugged everyone in sight and Santa seemed to enjoy it all.